ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Randomize
