you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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