I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
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