Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Randomize
