We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
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