I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Randomize
