its not stalking. its research.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Randomize
