capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
The police scanner is talking about you again....
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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