Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize