hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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