Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.