You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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