You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
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What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
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Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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