is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
The convent might be a nice break from real life
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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