Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
