id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Randomize
