Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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