we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
