You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
I'm really busy with my period
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