this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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