She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
