scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
There's always time for handjobs
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
