My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Randomize
