If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
