You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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