Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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