I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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