Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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