Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize