I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
