WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
