Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Did you just see the Batmobile???
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
