I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
