i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Randomize
