your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Randomize
