Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
