i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
