then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
