I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
