Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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