I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
