Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Randomize
