Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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