Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
