Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
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