I feel like abortions should bother me more
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
