Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
