i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
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