i jhust puked up my retainher.
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize