i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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