so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I AM VODKA MAN
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
