her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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